exams part 1

i dont know what to do, but actually i must do something= studying for next week exams, and those are really stressfull, because i dont even have th emotivation to start studying, i used to be the most diligent student in high school also the cleverest and everything not to be arrogant, but now honestly it flew away far from me. and even the serious one i mean the exams doesnt encourage me to start studying. i dont know what the hell is going on me?? am i to stress full? am i in a depression because of this life changing?

or what?? i dont even know...

i watched the first legally blonde as my movie motivation so that i could figured it out to start be a diligent girl again, but it was useless. fiuh.. kind of tired huh... always finding your true motivation whereas i know the brain is the motivation come from.

i am screwing my life...

can i get it back???

can i be the same person i was? nope i couldnt because of age and the different situation around , but at least similar???

life as a medical students

when i first entered the medschool, i was happy because surrounded by so many friends and with enjoyable life. although i moved to another town for this, i was from another city but i have to move to the capital city of my country so that i could enter this fascinating school.

yeah... i mentioned in my last post that life is me.. yes it is... but now it is more me... because you've never imagine what im going through here in medscholl, sometimes happy, sometimes sad, but always stressfull.

i used to be the smartest girl in my hometown, but moving here just really tough, everything you do is alone, they're such individual. and the study is hard really hard...

and everything change started from my size, and then my diligentness and everything in me changed so quickly, i tried.. and try to make it better, every plans ive planned just ink on th white paper, they are just plain plan. i always coping myself, try to know what can i do to make it better. but its nothing until now.

then somehow i watched julie and julia, kind of inspiration to me so i started to make a blog and have a target along with the deadline.

i dont know is this is gonna work, but should try it.

life???

what about life???

its fun should enjoy it, people told me...

its an obligation, people whispered me...

its tough many, people murmured...

its love, people shouted...

its lonely, some people say...

its an honor, people speech...

and whatever people say and told me about,

for me... life is me, life is now, life is breathing.

i am fully agree with them, i know how hard and how tough is life, but i wish life is not mention by any trouble you have, or by any surprises you feel, but life is mention by you.. yoursel